Chupacabra,
sneaking down the alleyway
skulking round the back porch
gonna have a heyday!

Chupacabra,
sucking all the goats dry
getting fat on ill-gains
and making little kids cry.

But what are you doing
to the immigrant farmer?
How will he feed his kids
You creepy little varmint?

What about the old lady’s
chickens in her backyard
you’re eating them for dinner
and you know she can’t get a job!

Chupacabra,
so elusive and evasive
taunting cryptozoologists
Your bloodlust is unsated.

Chupacabra,
with spikes, scales, or pig snout
do you have antennae?
Are you a purple-furred lout?

Are you misunderstood?
Perhaps you just need love,
or a little R&R
in the form of goat blood.

Something tells me we may hear from El Chupacabra next week.

Incidentally, I have a bin full of composting worms that I have named Chupacabra. Chupes is vegetarian, though, and has a strange distaste for avocado peels.

Related posts:

1. El Chupacabra’s Rebuttal

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