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	<title>Splarks Blog &#187; Rampaging</title>
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	<link>http://splarks.com/blog</link>
	<description>Short fiction involving marsupials, mad scientists, pez dispensers, good critters gone bad, irreverent behavior, unfortunate names, and existential crises.  Funny, bizarre stories and WTF humor.</description>
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		<title>The Chitin Kitten vs. New York City</title>
		<link>http://splarks.com/blog/2010/05/14/the-chitin-kitten-vs-new-york-city/</link>
		<comments>http://splarks.com/blog/2010/05/14/the-chitin-kitten-vs-new-york-city/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 14 May 2010 10:00:35 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>splarks</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Bizarre Animal Stories]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Rampaging]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[chitin]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[cockroaches]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[epic fail]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[evil kittens]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[kitten humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[world domination]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://splarks.com/blog/?p=384</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[ometimes I just have to amuse myself by writing a dreadful story. The urge arises spontaneously, clawing to be released to torment others.  This is why an early story of mine called "Lars the Pig with No Skin" is infamous among certain circles.  The Chitin Kitten emerged from the depths of my mind because Dave, who likes to rhyme words unnecessarily, put the words together.  Except "chitin" doesn't actually rhyme with "kitten."  But what do I care?
(Visit www.splarks.com for the whole sordid affair)


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		<wfw:commentRss>http://splarks.com/blog/2010/05/14/the-chitin-kitten-vs-new-york-city/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>1</slash:comments>
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		<item>
		<title>Bertrand the Serial Killer&#8217;s Bad Day</title>
		<link>http://splarks.com/blog/2009/10/17/bertrand-the-serial-killers-bad-day/</link>
		<comments>http://splarks.com/blog/2009/10/17/bertrand-the-serial-killers-bad-day/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 17 Oct 2009 06:56:51 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>splarks</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Extreme Optimism]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mythological Mishaps]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Rampaging]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[creative funny]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[creative humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[funny crap]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[funny stories]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[funny stuff]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[funny things]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[funny twisted humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[humor sites]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[intelligent funny]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[intelligent humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[random funny stuff]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[really funny stuff]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[serial Killer humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[twisted humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[twisted humor archives]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[weird humor]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://splarks.com/blog/?p=173</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[
D and I were sitting in bland TGI Friday&#8217;s-style restaurant when we started thinking about how often parents expect their children to carry on the family business, despite whether or not the kid is interested in it or good at it.  What happens if more nefarious parents wanted their children to carry on the family [...]


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		<wfw:commentRss>http://splarks.com/blog/2009/10/17/bertrand-the-serial-killers-bad-day/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>2</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Julius the Water Buffalo, resurrected!</title>
		<link>http://splarks.com/blog/2007/12/09/26/</link>
		<comments>http://splarks.com/blog/2007/12/09/26/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 09 Dec 2007 14:19:45 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>splarks</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Alien Oddities]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Bizarre Animal Stories]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Extreme Optimism]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Rampaging]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[alien]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[alien babies]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[alien corpse]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[alien humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[alien tentacles]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[animal fiction]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[animal humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[animal stories]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[baby aliens]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[creative funny]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[creative humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[funny aliens]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[funny animals]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[funny crap]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[funny poems]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[funny stories]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[funny stuff]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[funny things]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[funny twisted humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[humor and]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[humor sites]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[intelligent funny]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[intelligent humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[random funny stuff]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[really funny stuff]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[squirrel humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[twisted funny poems]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[twisted humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[twisted humor archives]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[water buffalo]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[weird humor]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://splarks.com/blog/2007/12/09/26/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Oh my.  I found an old story that Dave Goff from Gestalt Digital (www.gestaltdigital.com) kindly formatted and found pictures for several years ago.  I thought I had lost it forever, but no, it lives in infamy and I&#8217;ll post the scanned copy here to amuse/horrify/stupify you.  Happy Holidays!



No related posts.


No related posts.]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://splarks.com/blog/2007/12/09/26/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>1</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Penguin Revenge</title>
		<link>http://splarks.com/blog/2007/10/25/penguin-revenge/</link>
		<comments>http://splarks.com/blog/2007/10/25/penguin-revenge/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 25 Oct 2007 11:38:35 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>splarks</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Based on a True Story]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Bizarre Animal Poems]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Rampaging]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[animal humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[animal stories]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[creative funny]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[creative humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[cute penguin]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[emperor penguin]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[funny animals]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[funny crap]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[funny penguin]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[funny poems]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[funny twisted humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[humor and]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[humor sites]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[intelligent funny]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[intelligent humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[penguin]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[penguin pictures]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[penguin poem]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[penguin poetry]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[poetry]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[random funny stuff]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[really funny stuff]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[squirrel humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[twisted funny poems]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[twisted humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[twisted humor archives]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[weird humor]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://splarks.com/blog/?p=17</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Based on a true story &#8230; seriously &#8230;

O Haughty Penguin, shiny and staid
with magnificent yellow-white fluff;
You hate the zoo and are not made
for such banal and humid stuff.
The dictatorial zookeeper, fat and bossy,
insists that you play nice
But you present your response, so saucy:
a demonstrative penguin bite.
He jabs his walkie-talkie in your direction
to intimidate and corral,
but [...]


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		<wfw:commentRss>http://splarks.com/blog/2007/10/25/penguin-revenge/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>4</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Zombearo and the Brain Diet</title>
		<link>http://splarks.com/blog/2007/09/17/zombearo-and-the-brain-diet/</link>
		<comments>http://splarks.com/blog/2007/09/17/zombearo-and-the-brain-diet/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 17 Sep 2007 03:55:24 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>splarks</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Bizarre Animal Stories]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Rampaging]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Repentance & Wailing]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Zombie Attack]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[animal fiction]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[animal humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[animal stories]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[bear attack]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[bears]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[brains]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[creative funny]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[creative humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[funny animals]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[funny crap]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[funny poems]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[funny stories]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[funny stuff]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[funny things]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[funny twisted humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[humor and]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[humor sites]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[intelligent funny]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[intelligent humor]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[squirrel humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[twisted funny poems]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[twisted humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[twisted humor archives]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[weird humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[zombie coma]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[zombie cuisine]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[zombie rampage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[zombie survival]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://splarks.com/blog/?p=10</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Once upon a time, there was a bear named Zombearo. He was a bit melodramatic, what with the serape and sombrero, but he was good-hearted for a zombie bear. He didn’t eat too many kids, and when he did, he tried not to slurp the brains.
His life had started out tranquilly enough. He was like [...]


Related posts:<ol><li><a href='http://splarks.com/blog/2010/04/02/the-easter-bunny-dont-rise-from-the-dead/' rel='bookmark' title='Permanent Link: The Easter Bunny Don&#8217;t Rise from the Dead'>The Easter Bunny Don&#8217;t Rise from the Dead</a></li></ol>]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://splarks.com/blog/2007/09/17/zombearo-and-the-brain-diet/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Beatrice the Three-Eyed Marmot</title>
		<link>http://splarks.com/blog/2007/09/17/beatrice-the-three-eyed-marmot/</link>
		<comments>http://splarks.com/blog/2007/09/17/beatrice-the-three-eyed-marmot/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 17 Sep 2007 03:45:41 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>splarks</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Bizarre Animal Stories]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mythological Mishaps]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Rampaging]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Super Powers Suck]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[animal fiction]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[animal humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[animal stories]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Fairies]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[fairy godmother]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[funny animals]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[marmot]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[morals]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[revenge]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[rock band]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[rodents]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[rodents revenge]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[super powers]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://splarks.com/blog/?p=7</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[(From the archives)
Once upon a time there was a marmot named Beatrice.  Beatrice was a very special marmot because she had three eyes.  You might think this was a handy trait to have, but it actually triplicated her vision and made everything so blurry she couldn&#8217;t hunt.  She depended on her boyfriend [...]


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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
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